Thursday, April 5th

So, the reason I got to travel to Las Vegas was to film my second commercial for Sonic, the drive-in fast food company that has absolutely no locations where I live. In fact, the first time I had ever been to a Sonic was to film the first commercial.

You've seen these ads - two people in a car, waxing poetically about tater tots and coney dogs. This is the monitor that is in the car that is hard not to look at, so they eventually took it out.

This is Pat Piper, the man who conceived the ads, which started out as him and his buddies driving to rival fast food drive thrus and asking for things that you can only get at Sonic.
He is a big, Irish sweetheart and I love working with him.

The ads are mostly improvised, and I was lucky enough to film this one with my friend Sayjal, who is a star at the ol' i.O. and ComedySportz in Chicago. We had such a great time together. We shot the commercial in the evening, and the Sonic was still open. One of the servers there, who was wearing roller skates as Sonic servers tend to do, had never been on skates before or was extremely sensitive to gravity because she was falling. It was hilarious.

After the shoot, Kim (make-up/waredrobe, wearing the blue shirt) and Denise (producer, wearing white)
and Sayjal and I went and got some libations and had a low-key evening in the "production" suite. We popped popcorn and talked about our feelings. Just kidding. There was popcorn, though. It was such a blast.

Until J.R. (producer) started wearing my clothes. What can I say? This was day 5 for them and they were exhausted. I'm sure the libations had nothing to do with it, either.

Wednesday, April 4th

So I flew my behind off today. Antigua to Atlanta and then onto Vegas. On the way to Atlanta I sat right behind the first class section. I know I sound like the last person to do it in a pervy teenage comedy like American Pie, but I have never sat in first class. EVERYONE I know has sat in first class, even people who I am surprised they let on a plane in the first place.

But, if I can't get all the champagne and hot towels I want, I can at least see what it is like to take a first class pit-stop. Right?

Wrong.

All the lavatories were full for us huddled masses in coach, so I went to use the bathroom that was 15 feet away from my seat, and I was stopped by the first class stewardess who very curtly put up her hand and waved it towards me like I was a leper and barked, "Back! Back! Back!"

I checked my skin to see if I was covered in sores or if I had a wild dog following me but I didn't. So I gave her a look that very kindly said, "If you think you can treat me like that you do not know my ability to write a strongly worded letter to your superiors. And nice face lift. You're not fooling anyone, Joan Rivers."

She must have gotten my subtext, because when I returned from the groundlings bathroom (which was outside the plane) she asked me if I needed anything. And I sucked down that Diet Coke she brought me like it was my job.

Anyway, my bruised ego was salvaged from the aviation caste system when I got to my hotel in Vegas. It was the Signature, attached to the MGM Grand, and it was nicer than any hotel I have ever stayed in. I had a bathroom that was bigger than my apartment. And a full-on kitchen! With a toaster! I haven't seen a toaster in months! I even had a sitting room. I bet that stupid stewardess doesn't have a sitting room at her hotel.

Anyway, the sweet hotel room was enough pay back for me to decide not to call Delta and complain about the service. However, if I did call and complain it would have looked like this: But, here is what you can't see in the picture - I'm calling from my BATHROOM! Take that!

Happy Happy

Mr. and Mrs. Waltien (and Ali, Steve's sister, and Louise and Lily, the dachshunds) sent us Easter baskets! Right to the ship. These Easter baskets were filled with yummy candy, a lot of it made in Steve's hometown of Shelburne, VT. Steve really loves candy, so he was really, really excited. In fact, he finished all of his candy in about 5 minutes. I was notorious as a child for saving my Halloween candy for an absurdly long time - sometimes until the next Halloween. So, I was planning on saving my candy for a while. The basket was so pretty that it was hard to think about diving in and messing it up.
I was getting ready to go to bed, when something happened and I just sort of passed out. I'm not sure what happened, but I had a bruise on my cheek and when I woke up all of my candy was gone. Oh, well. I just felt bad because I was going to share it with Steve, and now it is all gone.

In all seriousness, thank you so much for the Easter greetings, Waltien Family!

Sunday, April 1st

Tonight, Steve and I decided to go on a nice, romantic date at Cagney's, the steak house on the ship. (Blog Trivia! When did Katie go to Cagney's before this? Answer at the end of the entry!) The day before, we had been sitting outside, eating a late lunch at the back of the ship. The sun was starting to set. "It would be nice to have a romantic date before I leave for Vegas," I had said. Steve pointed out that we were eating lunch while overlooking the beautiful ocean and sky - a view that we would easily pay $100 a person for. Things become kind of romantically relative on the ship, I guess.
Cagney's is set up with a very subtle mobster feel. There are some mug shots on the walls, like the one behind Steve.
But, like everything on the ship, it can't go too far with anything because cruises are all about including everyone and not offending. So there is just a dash of an organized crime-feel in the restaurant - not enough to make anyone think of body bags, but enough to make me remember that the final season of the Sopranos starts in one week and I will miss it. Sigh. I guess I'll just have to visit Italy to soothe the pain. (Blog Trivia Answer? For Matt Craig's birthday! For those of you who also pointed out that I am wearing the same dress I wore the last time I went to Cagney's, shut up.)

Thursday, March 29th

St. Thomas. Beach day. Let's do this up. We decided to take a trip to Morningstar Beach which was beautiful and sandy and sunny and wavey. The boys all impressed us with their fish-like swimming ability and the beach front restaurant impressed no one with it's ability to charge $18 for a hamburger and $5 for a can of Coors Light. It was one of those days where you look around at your situation - playing with new friends on a spectacular beach - and you just keep thinking, "This is preeeeetty all right."
Then we met this guy! He was just chilling, eating gourmet iguana food (read: grass). Like a bunch of jerks, we cooed over this guy like we just hadn't seen anything at all amazing that day, like a picture-perfect beach. I tried to take him home in the cab with us, but settled for a high five. Speaking of cabs, getting a cab in St. Thomas is one of the most stressful and bizarre experiences. You are attacked every step you take by cab drivers, cab dispatchers, and cabs themselves wanting to take you everywhere for what might be a very inflated price. Luckily, Cody and the gang were pros at this and knew that $6 per person was too much for Morningstar, and negotiated our price down to $5! Bring it on, bartering in outdoor markets in Greece!

There is a Cat in the Airport

Look at these two! Aren't they cute, eating sushi together?
Shouldn't they be cruising together?
Well, they aren't.
But, get this...STEVE is on the ship still.
I'M the one who is leaving.
Yep, I'm off to Vegas to film another Sonic commercial - shilling burgers and Coney dogs...LIVING THE DREAM! Hopefully, this one will air this time.
I am in the open-air Antigua airport. Apparently, the World Cup of Cricket is going on as we speak. Everyone seems non-plussed. Except my cab driver, who I think thought the stick shift was a cricket bat. Oh, and that my life was expendable.
And there is a cat in the airport. It has a food bowl. And the jerk security guard (even though he didn't point out there are matches in my carry-on) is watching me like a hawk because I want so desperately to take a picture of this cat. But, no pictures in the airport, please. Because the cat might be working for the bad guys, I guess.

Tuesday, March 27th

San Juan is a beautiful city with a rich history and much to offer its visitors. Which is why, after checking our email for free in a cafe, 13 of us piled into a van to make a trip to the Bacardi factory and take a tour.
It was very educational. I learned a lot. First off, drinking Bacardi products will make me look like a model, have lots of fun at clubs, and make me a really good dancer. I also learned that not drinking Bacardi rum basically makes me a supporter of Communist Cuba. Oh, and rum is made out of sugar cane and molasses. Oh, and Bacardi has a bat as its logo because the first distillery that the Bacardi family bought was infested with fruit bats, so they deemed fruit bats as a sign of luck and family unity. Talk about taking lemons and making lemonade...with rum! Boom! I'm hilarious.


That’s a lot to learn for a free tour, right? Especially when there is alcohol at the end of it. We each got two free Bacardi drinks of our choice as a reward for learning about the company. Also, there were these bulls everywhere, so I guess rum comes from bulls, too.

In the end, giving people free alcohol is a good way to prey on their guilt, because now I do feel like I owe Bacardi something, and will probably purchase their rum the next time I purchase rum. Which, based on my previous frequency of rum-purchasing, will be sometime in 2015. Or sooner, considering I don't want to be a Communist.